My sacrifice, O God, is a contrite spirit;
a heart contrite and humbled, O God, you will not spurn. – PS 51:19
my Lord, before you my life is an open book
in your gaze my soul is transparent
yet i fashion fig leaves of my own making
to hide the shame in my heart
so i seek to win back your favor
with fasting and exacting penitent observances
like i could hide my selfish intentions
and when i’ve exhausted all of my efforts
and lost all hope of earning redemption by myself
with despair gripping my soul and pride seeping away
all that was left was destitution – complete poverty of spirit
only then did i cry out for help
only then did i realize i needed you
only then did i turn to you with contrite heart
yet in that moment
i became aware of your presence
my tears turned from contrition to joy
as i felt your love pouring over me
now all i want to do
is fast from the world
and feast in your presence
with a contrite, humbled heart
Longing For Water 